Wednesday, 27 December 2023

THE RANTING BRUMMIE'S CHRISTMAS MASHUPS - GONE WITH THE WIND (1939) FEATURING ALL THE DOCTORS

"Gone With the Wind" (1939) is a classic novel and film that tells the story of Scarlett O'Hara, a spoiled Southern belle who lives through the American Civil War and Reconstruction. But what if she also encountered the various incarnations of the Doctor, the time-traveling alien hero from "Doctor Who", in her adventures? Here is a possible plot summary of how that could happen.

The story begins in 1861, when Scarlett is 16 years old and in love with Ashley Wilkes, who is engaged to his cousin Melanie Hamilton. At a barbecue at the Wilkes plantation, she meets an enigmatic elderly gentleman who calls himself the Doctor, a time traveller who has arrived in his TARDIS with his granddaughter Susan and his companions Ian and Barbara. The Doctor warns Scarlett that a war is coming and she should leave Tara, her family's plantation, for her safety, but she disbelieves him. She also meets Rhett Butler, a charming but cynical rogue who is instantly attracted to her.

The American Civil War breaks out and Scarlett's world is turned upside down. She marries Melanie's brother Charles, who dies of pneumonia soon after. She moves to Atlanta with Melanie, who is pregnant with Ashley's child. There, she meets the Second Doctor, who has regenerated into a new body after a battle with the deadly Cybermen. He is accompanied by Jamie and Zoe, who help Scarlett and Melanie escape from the city when it is besieged by the Union army. They also encounter Rhett again, who helps them get past a blockade.

Scarlett returns to Tara, where she finds her mother dead, her father senile, and the plantation in ruins. She vows to never be hungry again and takes charge of the family's survival. She also finds the Third Doctor, who has been exiled to Earth by his race, the Time Lords, and forced to regenerate again. He helps Scarlett to fend off scavengers and carpetbaggers who try to take advantage of the war-torn South. He also introduces her to his companion Jo Grant, who becomes friends with Scarlett.

Scarlett decides to marry her sister's beau Frank Kennedy, who owns a successful store in Atlanta. She uses his money to rebuild Tara and start a lumber business. She meets the Fourth Doctor, who has regenerated after being poisoned by radiation on the planet Metabelis III. He now travels with Sarah Jane Smith and Harry Sullivan, who are investigating a mysterious energy source in Atlanta. They discover that it is caused by the Master, the Doctor's arch-enemy, who plans to use a Time Lord artefact called the Key to Time to destroy the Earth. Together, they destroy the Key and foil the Master's scheme.

Scarlett becomes a wealthy and influential woman in Atlanta, but she is still unhappy. She realizes that she loves Rhett, who has made a fortune as a blockade runner and a gambler. She divorces Frank and marries Rhett, who gives her everything she ever wanted: a lavish mansion, and social acceptance. She comes face to face with the Fifth Doctor, who regenerated after falling from a radio telescope during another battle with the Master. He now travels with Adric, Nyssa and Tegan, who are trying to fix the TARDIS after it was damaged by a Cyberman attack. They join forces with Scarlett and Rhett to thwart a plot by the Black Guardian, who aims to use the Hand of Omega to alter history.

Scarlett's marriage to Rhett begins to fall apart due to her obsession with Ashley. She meets the Sixth Doctor, regenerated after contracting spectrox toxaemia on the planet Androzani and his companion Peri Brown, an American botany student from Fell's Point in Baltimore, Maryland. They encounter a battalion of Sontarans, who are planning to create a clone army and turn the tide of the Civil War in favour of the Confederacy, before intending to usurp them themselves. The Doctor and Peri team up once more with Scarlett and Rhett to stop them. The tide of war turns against the Confederacy after the Battle of Gettysburg, in which any of the men of Scarlett's town are killed. 

Eight months later, as the Union Army besieges the city in the Atlanta campaign, Melanie gives birth with Scarlett's aid, and Rhett helps them flee the city, before he chooses to go off to fight himself. She comes across the Seventh Doctor, who regenerated when his TARDIS was attacked by his rival Time Lord, the Rani. He now travels with Ace, a rebellious teenager from London. They encounter an ancient evil: Fenric, an entity that feeds on chaos and despair, who has manipulated events throughout history to create a web of suffering across America, including triggering the Civil War itself. The Doctor and Ace, together with Scarlett, manage to break his curse, helping to bring an end to the Civil War.

Scarlett realizes that she has lost everything that mattered to her: Rhett, Melanie, Ashley (who has remarried), and Tara (which has been sold). She encounters the Eighth Doctor and his companion, Grace Holloway, a cardiologist who operated on him after being shot by 20th century gangsters in San Francisco, causing him to regenerate once more. They face one of the Doctor's oldest enemies: Davros, the creator of the Daleks. He has escaped from his prison on Skaro and intends to use the Eye of Harmony to take over the universe. The Doctor, Grace and Scarlett are able defeat him, but Scarlett is left feeling fearful of the Daleks after the Doctor chronicles his battles with them to her.

With the defeat of the Confederacy and the end of the Civil War, the O'Haras toil in the cotton fields. One afternoon on a trip to Columbus, Scarlett talks to an elderly Englishman in a who says he too fought in a war, which he refers to as the "Time War", that he 'used to be a Doctor', but refers to himself as such no moreScarlett decides to start a new life and travels to Ireland, where she reconnects with her ancestral roots. She meets the Ninth Doctor, who regenerated after the Time War. He now travels with Rose Tyler, a shop assistant from London who became his companion after he saved her from the Autons. They witness the Easter Rising, a rebellion against British rule. They also encounter a group of Slitheen, who are disguised as human military leaders and plan to use the rebellion to infiltrate human society to pave the way for a full-scale invasion. The Doctor and Rose are able stop them with Scarlett's help once again.

Scarlett settles in Ireland and becomes involved in the Irish War of Independence and the Irish Civil War. She meets the Tenth Doctor, who regenerated after absorbing the Time Vortex from Rose in order to save her life, and Martha Jones, a medical student from London who joined him after he saved her from the Judoon. They land in Ireland, where they face a new threat: the Weeping Angels, statues that can move when not observed and send people back in time to feed on their time displacement energy. The Doctor and Martha manage to escape from them with Scarlett's assistance, and trap the Angels permanently in a time loop.

Scarlett lives a peaceful life in Ireland until she receives a letter from Rhett, who asks her to come back to him, but not before she runs into the Eleventh Doctor. His companions are Amy Pond and Rory Williams, a married couple from Leadworth. Amy explains to Scarlett that they became his companions years after he crashed his TARDIS in Amy's backyard when she was a child when the Doctor regenerated after defeating the Master and the Time Lords. They encounter a colony of Silurians, reptilian humanoids who were the original inhabitants of Earth, and who want to reclaim their planet from humans. The Doctor, Amy, Rory and Scarlett are able prevent them from doing so, using Scarlett's experiences from the Irish uprising.

Scarlett decides to finally return to America and reunite with Rhett. As she arrives in New York, she comes across the Twelfth Doctor, finally having regenerated after centuries spent fighting the Daleks and Cybermen on Trenzalore. He travels with Clara Oswald, a pretty young school teacher from London who became his companion after he saved her from the Great Intelligence. They they face another old foe of the Doctor's: the Zygons, shape-shifting aliens who can impersonate humans. They have infiltrated the US government and plan to use a device called an Osgood Box to trigger a world war. However, the Doctor, Clara and Scarlett are able to broker a truce, after Scarlett tells them of the immense poverty and suffering caused by the Civil War.

Scarlett finds Rhett waiting for her at Tara, which he has bought back for her. They embrace and declare their love for each other. She meets the Thirteenth Doctor, who to Scarlett's surprise has regenerated into a sprightly blonde woman after falling from a spaceship. She travels with Graham O'Brien, Ryan Sinclair and Yasmin Khan, three friends from Sheffield who became her companions after they encountered an alien threat called the Stenza. Together they face the Morax, parasitic aliens who can possess humans and turn them into mud zombies. They have escaped from their prison in Andersonville, a former Confederate prisoner-of-war camp, to conquer the Earth. Scarlett once again helps the Doctor and her companions to defeat them. 

Scarlett and Rhett have a daughter, Bonnie, but Scarlett still pines for Ashley and, chagrined at the perceived ruin of her figure, refuses to have more children or share a bed with Rhett. One night, she encounters the Fourteenth Doctor, but is shocked to find that he now has a similar appearance to that of his tenth incarnation, and they reminisce about their lives, loves and losses. After the Doctor departs in his TARDIS, Scarlett and Rhett argue about Ashley. A drunken Rhett forces himself upon Scarlett, and carries her against her will to the bedroom. Rhett subsequently apologizes for his behaviour and offers Scarlett a divorce, which she rejects. 

When Rhett returns from a trip to London, Scarlett informs him she is pregnant, but an argument ensues, resulting in her falling down a flight of stairs and, despite help from a strong-willed black English nurse called Ruth Clayton, suffers a miscarriage. While recovering, tragedy strikes when Bonnie dies attempting to jump a fence on her pony. Scarlett and Rhett visit Melanie, who has suffered complications from a new pregnancy, on her deathbed. As Scarlett consoles Ashley, Rhett prepares to leave Atlanta. Having realized that it was Rhett, and not Ashley she truly loved all along, Scarlett pleads with Rhett to stay, but he rebuffs her and walks away into the morning fog. 

A distraught and devastated Scarlett resolves to return home to Tara. She sees the TARDIS materialise before her once again, and with Rhett seemingly gone forever, she decides to finally join the Doctor, now in his Fifteenth incarnation, on his adventures through time and space, along with his new companion, Ruby Sunday. Scarlett vows that she will return to Tara one day and win Rhett back for good as she boards the TARDIS, which departs for places unknown.